Did you know that every state in US has certain requirements and procedures for divorce? If you reside in Illinois and are considering getting divorced, there are some important things you will first need to know. You will want to first review Illinois' divorce requirements and be sure to determine that you are, in fact, eligible for a divorce.

Am I Eligible?

Per state law, at least one spouse must be a resident of the state of Illinois and have maintained residency for 90 days or more. Residency requirements are varied from state to state. Some states simply require 90 days of residency, while others require longer periods of time. Connecticut, for example, requires 12 months of residency, and then a 90 day waiting period, before being eligible to file for divorce.

You or your spouse have decided to file for divorce and you are starting the divorce process and deciding which type of child custody to petition for. There are more options for child custody than before and parents are starting to consider alternative options to child custody beyond sole and joint custody. While sole and joint custody are still the most popular forms of custody agreements in a divorce, there are parents who are opting to use split custody or bird's nest custody instead.

Types of Custody

 In Illinois, custody is decided by the court and will look at the best interest of the children. The types of child custody include:

A Utah man has filed a $130 million lawsuit against the biological mother of his son, who he claims, put their son up for adoption without his knowledge. According to his lawsuit, Whitney Pettersson Demke "essentially kidnapped" his son, and she conspired with the adoptive parents and the adoption agency in an "illegal, deceit-ridden infant adoption" that has kept him from his son.

In 2010, Jake Strickland was dating Demke when she told him she was pregnant. Although the two did not remain a couple and stopped dating before the baby was born, they both agreed to co-parenting responsibilities for the child. According to Strickland, during the pregnancy, they picked out a name for the baby boy - Jack - and he gave Demke money for medical and other expenses, attended doctor's appointments with her, and had even decorated a room in his home for his son's nursery.

On December 29, 2010, Strickland's son was born. However, Demke not only didn't tell him of the baby's birth, but she put the baby boy up for adoption the day after the birth. On the child's birth certificate, she wrote that she did not know who the father was.

Brown University recently completed a research project looking at more than 30 years of data about divorce, marriage, and remarriage for individuals living in Massachusetts. Their results found that people are more likely to get a divorce if a friend or close family member gets a divorce.

Looking at thousands of residents in the Framingham area, the study found that people were 75 percent more likely to get divorced if a friend went through the process first. For those who knew that a friend of a friend got divorced, 33 percent of couples were likely to get divorced. The primary researcher on the project argues that this is evidence of "social contagion", likening divorce to a rumor that has the potential to touch friends as far as two degrees removed from the situation.

Some additional interesting findings from the study included that popular people (who tend to have a stronger support network) are less likely to divorce, that divorce decreased a person's popularity, and that people who are divorced are more likely to partner in the future with other divorced individuals.

A lot goes on emotionally when two people decide to divorce. It is much like grieving a loss of a loved one, because essentially, you are losing someone who you thought would be in your life forever. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, stress can take a toll on the body. Therefore, it is important that while going through the process, you learn how to alleviate some of the stress that could cause common behavioral changes associated with a divorce.

The stress of divorce will manifest differently in men and women, but more often women tend exhibit outward changes such as crying, fatigue, depression, feelings of guilt, fear, and anxiety about the future, mood swings, and sleeplessness. Men and women alike may turn to substance abuse as a means to cope. Coping is a key word, and many women have learned how to cope effectively with these techniques and others.

Learn to Relax